


The Day Our Home Collapsed

by Skyscrapper



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: 2park, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, full of regrets, it's too late to realize, max is a human being
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-10
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-21 12:39:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16576670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyscrapper/pseuds/Skyscrapper
Summary: He always knew Jihoon has the right to know, but he just couldn’t give him the answer. No one expected this to happen to them considering their 10 years of being together.Finally, he took all the courage to utter the words he’d been trying to say for almost 2 years





	The Day Our Home Collapsed

**Author's Note:**

> I've been contemplating if I should post this. I know I am late, but here you go. :)

“I can’t do this anymore,” Woojin said in a deep calm voice.

  
It took a moment for that to actually sink in before Jihoon finally asked, “Why?” He didn’t seem to be surprised by the other’s words.

  
Woojin tried not to answer the question. He was prepared to tell him what he feels, but he wasn’t ready to tell him the reason.

  
They still slept on their room together that cold night, but silence filled the room. Only a crying sound could be heard and Woojin’s fully aware where it was coming from. It was expected and somehow, hearing him cry had been a form of release.

  
He always knew Jihoon has the right to know, but he just couldn’t give him the answer. No one expected this to happen to them considering their 10 years of being together.

  
Finally, he took all the courage to utter the words he’d been trying to say for almost 2 years.

  
“It’s still Somi.”

  
Jihoon actually had been waiting for a specific “three-word sentence” from him. It’s been two years since he last heard those words and he’s been eager to hear them again. But he got a different three-word sentence today.

  
He always knew of Somi and Woojin’s past. They were best friends who fell in love with each other in high school before Jihoon and Woojin met in college. He’s not surprised that the past still had a place in his man’s heart since they were each other’s first love.

  
Woojin anticipated for the other’s reply. He knew it would make him mad and would hurt him, but it’s better to tell him now before he becomes a coward again. Unexpectedly, Jihoon’s response wasn’t what he thought would be his reaction all this time.

  
“Okay.” _Emotionless_.

  
Suddenly, a deafening silence echoed the room. Woojin couldn’t hear Jihoon crying anymore. With a sense of guilt, he turned and forced Jihoon look at him…

  
And he regretted he did.

  
The moment their eyes met, he could already feel the older’s coldest gaze first the first time. He hated it. Jihoon’s silence all this time. It would made him feel better if Jihoon yelled, or threw tantrums, or cried as loud as he can. But the other just stayed calm and didn’t seem surprised as if he already knew all along.

  
Woojin has always been so loud, but this time, he turned to be the total opposite of who he is.

  
In the morning, Woojin woke up and found Jihoon seriously scribbling something on a piece of paper. Upon seeing Woojin, Jihoon folded the paper and put it inside an antique box with flower carvings before finally speaking up.

  
“Can you do this little favor for me before-?” He hesitated a little before he continued. “It’s for Max.”

  
Max was their adopted kid. They met him on the corner of the street they always pass through everytime they buy ice cream together. The life-struggle of this 10-year-old kid was witnessed by the owner of the convenience store who told them how the boy lived all this time. He was with his mom months ago, but eversince she died, the boy had been strolling around the street…alone. No one knows where he sleeps. The pitiful kid asked the owner for food everyday. He said he wanted to take him in, but he couldn’t because his wife will kill him on the spot.

  
This story had brought the boy to Jihoon and Woojin’s home… Jihoon took him in. He loved him so much.

  
“Tell me what you want," Woojin said, anticipating for the favor.

  
“For three months, let’s live our lives as normal as possible.”

  
The younger knew it would be hard, but for Max, he could probably pull it off.

  
Then Jihoon continued, “Remember the first time we moved to this home?”

  
_Home_. That hurts Jihoon somehow. He couldn’t believe his dream home is now collapsing right in front of his eyes- the place where he is supposed to live with the person whom he dearly love forever.

  
“Carry me again like that into our room…everyday…for the next months.”

  
Woojin wanted to question the thought, but somehow, he just accepted the strange request since it will only last for three months.

  
That same day, Woojin and Somi met. The man immediately told about the situation.

  
“Jihoon’s really ridiculous.”

  
“I know. I just want to get over it soon.”

  
Everything’s a little different in the house since Woojin’s confession. Silence always find it’s way to every corner and Max finally noticed what’s happening.

  
“Is there something wrong? Are you having a fight, Woojinie hyung?” the innocent kid asked.

  
“Nothing, sweetie! Just focus on your exam. Later you will witness something for the first time. Don’t worry. We’re fine.” A grimace followed his reply.

  
Jihoon finally came back home from his taping. He seemed tired. Woojin took this chance for Max to see that they _at least as a facade_ , they were fine. He lifted the older and carried him bridal style to their room. Jihoon felt heavy.

 

Max couldn’t stop feeling giddy seeing his hyungs being lovey-dovey in the middle of the night right in front of his eyes.

  
Upon closing the door, The younger put the older down slowly. Jihoon broke the silence, “Thanks.”

  
“You’re welcome.”

  
“Don’t tell Max about our separation.”  
Woojin just nodded, but somehow he felt a pinch in his heart. Something he has never felt for the past two years.

  
_Separate. That feeling of being apart._

  
He tried to ignore it. Maybe, it’s just because of the spur of the moment.

  
Days and weeks passed, Woojin carried Jihoon without fail. Max started to feel excited and amused by what he had been witnessing every night and started to cheer for them everytime.

  
In a month, Woojin and Jihoon finally felt relaxed and comfortable as they did the act in front of Max. Jihoon leaned and held tight whenever he felt like falling. Woojin could smell the older’s perfume which he loved very much-something uniquely Jihoon.

 

Memories flashed back. He remembered the day when he asked Jihoon to buy that brand because he liked the smell so much. How Jihoon tried to hide how he loathed that smell, but used it anyway for Woojin. Then eventually, ended up liking it.

  
On some days, it seemed natural to them as they both laughed especially to that moment when Jihoon’s head hit the door because Woojin was too focused at Max who was having a hard time washing the dishes in the kitchen. Most of the days, they genuinely were enjoying this that made Woojin have this strange feeling. He just brushed it off again.

  
The last month was different. Woojin realized he’s getting used to this feeling because Jihoon seemed lighter compared to the past months. They had been talking casually about how their days ended as Woojin carry the older in his arms. But they felt awkward everytime Jihoon was put down. A total silence always filled the room.

  
One morning, he found a lot of apparels scattered on the floor and on their bed. Jihoon couldn’t find good clothes to wear. All of his clothes seemed to get bigger. That’s when Woojin realized Jihoon lost a lot of weight in the span of three months. He could carry him on his arms easily not because he was used to it, but because Jihoon had been getting thinner. The younger just realized it now.

  
“H-Hoonie.”

  
_Did he call me Hoonie again?_

  
“Did you call me?”

  
“J-Jihoon…” Woojin’s tone is uneasy.

  
“Yes?”

  
“N-othing. Just have a good sleep.”

  
_Strange_.

  
A feeling of anxiety filled Woojin’s heart. A feeling he almost had forgotten. The feeling of not wanting anything bad to happen to the person he love for 10 years. Why did Woojin forget that?

  
On the last day, Woojin could feel the tight wrap around his neck. It seemed like Jihoon didn’t want to let go. This time, he couldn’t smell the perfume of his most favorite fragrance anymore. When they reached the room, Woojin slowly and carefully put him down. But he never expected what happened next.

  
Jihoon held his hand, hugged him tight and whispered, “Three months’ up, Woojin. You can finally let go of me…for good.”

  
Then like a truck, it hit Woojin. Just one touch from Jihoon and everything just came back naturally. Just one hug from Jihoon made him remember what he had forgotten. He found his way to feel what he actually felt the first time his heart beats crazy. How his heart felt like it’s about to burst from his ribcage everytime Jihoon acted cutely when he wanted chicken. How Jihoon’s smile could relieve all his worries and stress for the day. How his warmth made him want to protect him and give him all the wonderful things on the planet.

  
He felt his heart torn to millions of pieces. He can’t do it. He can’t leave the love of his life. He can’t just throw away their 10 years together. He can’t just abandon the person who taught him what love truly means. The person who becomes his home. Just the thought of them separating is killing him. He needs to make things right. From there, he knew what he needed to do.

  
The next day, Woojin and Somi met after three months of waiting. Woojin tried hard not to hurt the lady’s feelings, but as it seemed to fail, he accepted the slap from her. He knew he’s at fault and deserved this.

  
Woojin ran away. He wanted to ran away since last night. He couldn’t imagine how he’s been an asshole to the two most important persons in his life. He hurt not just one person who love him so much- his soulmate and his best friend. He cant seem to face both of them. The world even. Not now. He isolated himself and contemplated about his actions in a far-off land only the heaven’s knew where.  
________

  
It took a year for Woojin to make up his mind and to realize he needed to redeem himself- _to fully renew his love to Jihoon_. He needed to make things right and put everything back into its place.

  
He wore his best suit and bought a bouquet of daffodils. He knew of its meaning- rebirth and new beginnings. It doesn’t take an intellectual to know what he wanted to say based from the flowers, but he knew Jihoon isn’t a genius. So he prepared a script just in case. He also made sure to write this on the card:

 

 

>   
>  _“From now on, I will carry you every morning and every night. ‘Til death do us part.”_

  
He knew he needed to pass through the eye of a needle before Jihoon can fully forgive him. He must accept the consequences. He knew this very well. As determined and persistent as he is, he would do absolutely anything for Jihoon to forgive and accept him again.

  
Upon reaching a familiar house, he froze and couldn’t move his feet. He took a small paper and read the script he wrote the night before to make sure he wouldn’t forget a word.

  
“You can do it, _asshole_!”

  
He took all of his courage and just took one step only to find a group of family leaving the house.

  
He immediately ran towards them and nervously asked, “Erm. Excuse me, where is the person living in this house?”

  
“We’re the ones living here. Why do you ask?” The old woman asked.

  
“N-nothing. I think I got the wrong address.”

  
Confused, he immediately called Baejin, Jihoon’s closest friend.

  
“Baejin, it’s me. W-Woojin.” He hesitated telling his name because the person on the other line might just end the call. But-

  
“Woojin hyung!!! Oh good Lord! Where have you been all this time you, _bastard_?”

  
“This bastard needed time to think, okay. It took me a while, but where’s Jihoon? And Max?”

  
“I- I think we need to meet.”

  
The sound of Baejin’s voice didn’t seem to be a good sign. He just hoped everything’s fine.

  
_______

  
Woojin took a sip from his green grape smoothie and prepared himself for a hard punch from the person he’s about to meet. He knew he’s been an asshole- a bastard- a trash- a pain in the ass, and all the words related to them. He just wanted to see Jihoon as soon as possible.

  
He heard the chime of the door from the coffee shop. He first saw a familiar boy entering the door and holding Baejin’s hand- someone who reminded him of how amazing of a person Jihoon is. How Jihoon has always been a caring person. How Jihoon always thinks of others first before himself- Max.

  
“Hyung! Jihoonie, hyung…he- Woojin hyung….” the boy rushed to hug him tight. He cried as soon as he reached his waist, as if asking for comfort.

  
“I- Im sorry, hyung.”

  
Confused, but Woojin felt the sadness in Baejin’s tone. It didn’t feel right.

  
“Why?! Did anything happen? Where’s my Hoonie?”

  
He can hear himself. The voice which sounded uneasy. The sound that he heard when he last saw Jihoon.

  
“He- he’s gone. Forever.”

  
Jihoon has been battling with cancer all this time and Baejin was the only person who knew.

  
Woojin felt weak, physically, mentally and emotinally. He couldn’t believe what he just heard.

  
“P-please tell me you’re joking,” his voice is trembling.

  
“He didn’t want you to know. He wanted you to be happy, hyung. Genuinely.”

  
Woojin thought the biggest regret in his life was the moment when he left Jihoon. But now, he regretted his mere existence. He turned to be a total failure. To himself. To Max. To Jihoon.

  
_Words left unsaid. Actions left undone._

  
He should have been there for him in those years he’s been an asshole. He should have made him happy. He should have stayed and held his hand. He should have said the three-word sentence he knew Jihoon had been wanting to hear all along.

  
Max loosen his tight hug and utter the words that made Woojin’s world totally fall apart. He was oblivious about what happened a year ago. Jihoon explained that his Woojin hyung went on a trip abroad for his work and there’s no means for them to communicate because he’s somewhere in the middle of an ocean in Hawaii.

  
“Woojinie hyung. Jihoonie hyung had been so happy. He said it’s all because of you! You made him the happiest on his last days. He said carrying him in your arms was his most favorite act of love you had given him.”

  
_How could Jihoon say he had been happy?_

  
Now it finally sank in. There had been a reason for that absurd request. Jihoon knew he would die soon. He wanted to feel something special before he bid goodye. Although for Woojin, it was only an act to deceive Max, it was an act of love for Jihoon. He also wanted to make sure that Max would see him as a loving and caring partner.

  
Baejin handed him an antique box before leaving Max in his hands. As he opened the box, he smelled a familiar scent. The perfume. His most favorite fragrant. Something that’s uniquely Jihoon.

  
It was the same box where Jihoon put a written letter the day Woojin saw him scribbling after he confessed about Somi. The day when Jihoon asked for that favor. He opened the letter which inscribed:

>   
>  “ _Nae_ _sarang, Woojinie,_
> 
> _I am really sorry for not telling you. I knew it all along. I knew how you feel. For the past two years, I knew your love for me is not as strong and deep as before. But I’m afraid you will leave me as soon as I tell you. And I didn’t want that. So I slowly and silently prepared myself of letting you go._
> 
> _The moment you told me you can’t do it anymore, I knew I’m ready. But my time is limited. It’s been so selfish of me, I know, for asking such an absurd favor. I don’t expect you to agree with it, but I will thank the heavens if you do. I will be so happy.”_

On another paper, it said:

 

> _“Woojinie, I don’t know what to say but I am grateful. You don’t know how hard I tried for you not to notice that my heart had been beating so fast everytime you carried me. I always anticipate you coming home because you will carry me. It’s the only way for me to get close to you again- to feel your heartbeat, even I know it’s doesn’t beat for me anymore. I loved wrapping my arms around you. In that way, I could smell your hair or could take a peek at your snaggletooth. I love it when you asked me how my day ended. I felt you saw my presence again. But then again, I know I had been so greedy for making you do something against your will. It made me happy, even if it didn’t for you. I am sorry for making you feel uncomfortable._
> 
>   
>  _I know I might not see you again. And for sure, I am gone by the time you read this letter._
> 
>   
>  _I don’t hate you, Woojin. I hate myself. For not being able to complete you. For my incompetence to make you feel you are amazing as a person, as a partner. I'm sorry for doing things that made you fall out of love for me. For not telling you I love you enough. For showing and giving you the least efforts that made you grew less in love with me every single day._
> 
>   
>  _I regret not showing you enough love in those 10 years. In our next life, I promise to be better.”_

  
Woojin reads the last paper:

>   
>  _“Thank you for giving me the best home I always dream of, Woojinie! But I guess our home didn’t deserve to stay. I found a new family who would create this house into a new home again. I hope they won’t end up like us._
> 
>   
>  _As I write this letter, I am wishing that you really have found and built a happy home into the arms of the person you have chosen. My only wish is for you to include Max as a part of it. Ours may have fallen apart. But it will be the home that I will always want to go back to._
> 
>   
>  _I love you! Always am. Always will.”_

  
But now, there’s no Jihoon.

  
The home is gone. Forever.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! This is my first work. I know it's not as good as everyone's work, but I hope everyone appreciates. I got the inspiration from the blog of a couple and ended up writing this. It would be nice if you tell me your thoughts. I will try to be better. 
> 
> If this flops, it's fine. :)


End file.
